There’s a worship song that goes like this:
You are the holy one
You are the living word
You are the center of my focus, Jesus
You are the son of God
You are the solid rock
You are the center of my focus Jesus
Right now, I’m understanding the meaning of having God as the centre of your focus.
Sometimes the world may offer enticing happiness that could probably last for a while, but I need more than earthly joy to make me truly happy. I need spiritual growth and a sense of close relationship with The Creator. I grow up with God. Being away from my family from a tender age, I learn to seek God for advises. If you have don’t believe in God you might not understand how is it possible to consult God or you might think I probably was just seeking my own conscience. It wasn’t. I felt God’s presence. His presence is like the wind that you don’t see but you can feel. When I no longer sense God’s presence as close to me, I felt my spirit’s dryness and thirst. Anyway, why am I sharing this?
I’m in need of friends who share my faith. I do have plenty of them but perhaps because of the settings or the way I appear as a hedonistic/not-one-to-talk-serious, makes it harder to start a religious discussion. The thing is I hardly take anything seriously and am lacking in sense of urgency. It’s not that I live like life is a big joke but I always seem to think there are more important things to be concern about than results/work/conflicts/any-current-situation. Sometimes I get frustrated with myself for not feeling the intensity, especially when I know I should. When it comes to talking about religious stuff, sometimes I tend to talk about it light-heartedly too… after all, you won’t have heavy conversation about how the wind is like, right? e.g imagine two people with straight faces discussing something like “The wind is colorless or is it transparent?” Okay not a very good example. But when it comes to God’s doing in life, then I would be more serious like discussing about news about hurricane/tornado. I’m not sure if I’m getting my point across. I’m sure many of you are lost as to what the heck am I talking about because that’s what I’m questioning myself right now.
What I really wanted to say was I love my God, Jesus Christ. I have wandered away many times but He has always been the same God whom I could never out-love. Happy Father’s Day, Abba.
P.S: Do you realize I’ve made you read confusing chunk of paragraphs just to arrive at the last three sentences? … my title has warned you. lol.